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Family Duty

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Review of chapter "Chapter One" from kelvin
Review:
liked to read more before i say what i think but i will admit interest in the story
Review By [kelvin] • Date [1 Sep 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from kalibex
Review:
Good start - with a good plot twist (having Buffy's Hank be *that* Hank), but the two explanatory paragraphs telling us a little more about her reluctance to call would IMO be better if broken up a bit (instead of being such big text blocks). You could also make it clearer that she's calling her estranged father, then still have that big reveal at the end (that he's an x-man) when the phone is answered.
Review By [kalibex] • Date [1 Sep 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from (Recent Donor)tchizek
Review:
Hmm interesting, I can hardly wait to see the fallout from this!
Review By [(Recent Donor)tchizek] • Date [1 Sep 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from serenityselena
Review:
interesting story....
hope to read more soon ^_^
Comments from author:
that soon enough?
Review By [serenityselena] • Date [1 Sep 12] • Not Rated
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