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The Vampire Child

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Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from CageFire
Review:
Somewhat interesting story. Although it does kind of feel drawn out, then again the chapters aren't too long so maybe it feels more drawn out than it is. Anyway, I'll be looking forward to the meeting with his parent(s).
Review By [CageFire] • Date [29 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from AllenPitt
Review:
Ok, speak with the guy who found X., then off to the 'spot' in the city that the spell found. That's going to be one interesting meeting, assume Magnus & company are in (ie not off in Tibet or the inner earth or whatever).
H. Magnus has lost one child already, traumatically. Finding out about a new one--equal parts gladness, and much with the anger towards Tesla if she figures he's behind it. And the "Xander is a vampire" is a huge clue.
Meanwhile she might be horrified to find out that Xander is part of a group that "hunts down 'Abnormals'" as she might see them....
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [29 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from RevDorothyL
Review:
Very glad you're continuing with this story!
Review By [RevDorothyL] • Date [29 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Nice to see more of this story. Stylistically, this chapter is filler due to the conversations that don't really tell us much, but I can see where you put some character moments and plot moments in.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from RevDorothyL
Review:
Intriguing! Xander will definitely be better off with Helen Magnus and Nikola Tesla as parents than he was with the Harrises (even if Helen may be more than a little miffed that Nikola used her DNA to make a child and then didn't give HER the option to raise him alongside of Ashley -- whom I'm assuming is already dead at this point in the "Sanctuary" chronology?).

I hope you continue with this, and I look forward to seeing what comes next.
Review By [RevDorothyL] • Date [17 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from JediKnight
Review:
Still comes across as campy or scripted.
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [17 Dec 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from AllenPitt
Review:
huh. Just occurred to me that doing a 'parent locator' might return THREE results: Tesla, present-Helen and 'went-to-the-past-and-is-waiting to get back to the present Helen'. You probably don't want to go there, though.
The adoption agency likely is a dead end ... present-Helen could be anywhere in the world, of course, same for Tesla. Xander would be a LOT better off finding Helen first, IMO.
So X. gets partial vampirism from Tesla, maybe longevity from Helen... weird.
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [16 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Slow moving, but continues to be interesting and thoughtful.
Did Willow have a cold when she told Xander she bought a ticket?

“I reserved us a ticked."
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [16 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from JediKnight
Review:
Good plot, but your story is a bit too campy
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [11 Dec 12] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Good chapter. Thanks for continuing.
Comments from author:
Thanks.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [10 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from (Current Donor)SusanAnthony
Review:
This is an interesting story! I look forward to Xander meeting his parents and seeing what will happen next!
Comments from author:
Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [(Current Donor)SusanAnthony] • Date [10 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from possom
Review:
Interesting idea, but you seem to use a way to formal speech patern, like I am instead of I'm an you are instead of you're.
Comments from author:
Thank you for your review and your observation. I will change that in the next chapters.
Review By [possom] • Date [7 Dec 12] • Rating [5 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Four" from banditdoz
Review:
Great story so far and your only making it more intresting :D thank you
Comments from author:
Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [banditdoz] • Date [6 Dec 12] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Four" from AllenPitt
Review:
Hm. I'm betting Helen Magnus knows about slayers, and doesn't like them much. She's all about protecting Abnormals, Slayers are all about slaying. May have killed a few Abnormals in the past, thinking they were demons, lots of room for misunderstandings there.
It'll be interesting to see if Giles knows about the "Tesla" type of vampirism. Probably his books would say they're a species of demon that died out centuries ago. Maybe it was a Council funded expedition that wiped out their last city? '
Hey. Could Marcie the Invisible Girl be a descendant of the invisible man who was one of the founders of Helen's little group? .... Also if Giles makes the connection to Sanctuary, he'd probably have contact info on it, Helen M. is fairly well known to most governments, I think.
Comments from author:
Thanks for reviewing and for your ideas.
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [6 Dec 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Four" from VillageOrchid
Review:
I like "supportive" Scoobies stories. Especially liked you spelling out:
“Of course I would never do that. You are my friend Xander. Whatever you are, you are still my friend. And I don’t think you would ever hurt someone without a reason.” Buffy assured him.
Comments from author:
Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [6 Dec 12] • Not Rated
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